justify

So I realized that I never introduced why I named this blog (and most any writing I do) "unquiet riot." Looking at these entries, I note how relatively docile my words are. This is not the case for the words that course through me every day. Unquiet riot speaks to the voices I hear, on various frequencies, throughout the day and well into the night. Unquiet riot is the ticcing and convulsing of my body in response to obscenities noone else can hear. It's based on the plea that Phillip Larkin posed and could never fulfill -- to quiet the riot of his mind. And it's something I avoid making public for fear of a second alienation (the first began and continues the minute strange sounds echoe in my brain but fail to materialize to others). The fear I have to name the words and voices at all. I willfully forget the minute I've heard some taunt, jab, or rhyme start repeating inside . . . they are not pretty epithets, not particularly poetic. They are rambling and foreign and only seem to point to psychosis. But they are there, will likely remain, and I thought I'd say it to someone, let someone know. They've been real fucking loud the past couple days.